Welcome to a brand-new (and maybe full time?) article series: Let’s Talk About. This series is all about small issues or naming dilemmas one might encounter that don’t necessarily need a full “Opinions On…” piece for a variety of reasons, whether that be lack of evidence, no real debate surrounding the issue at hand, requiring more community discussion than just Pros and Cons, or something entirely different. Although this may just be a one-time thing, community suggestions and ideas for topics would really help me continue to come up with ideas for articles. Anyway, today’s topic of discussion is “trendy.” Not names that are trendy, that’s more of an Opinions On topic, but the word “trendy” and what it’s come to mean. Because let’s face it: randombabynameforum.com is swarming with this word, and it has become virtually imperative to choosing a name for a child. So let’s get right into this juicy word!
I’ll be frank here: all too often, we march onto randombabynameforum.com and see someone asking for advice. “Which one is best?” asks the title, “Hartleigh, Nomi, or Reign?” We proceed to inform them that all of the above options are “too trendy,” and then hand them a list of our favorites: Juliet, Isla, and Aurora. This isn’t the case for everyone, but I’ve been guilty of thinking this, and it’s a word that is often used to sum up when you don’t like something. The truth is, Juliet, Isla, and Aurora fit the dictionary description of “trendy” much more than Hartleigh, Nomi, or Reign. And yet, all names that feel unfamiliar to us, or don’t float our boat, or aren’t our personal favorites get slapped underneath the label of “trendy.”
By definition, the word trendy is “in fashion” or “a fad.” But let’s be honest: Juliet, Isla, and Aurora are just as current and modern as Hartleigh, Nomi, and Reign. In fact, they’re actually far more popular, making them more desirable for modern day parents, and therefore trendier. It’s inevitable that names sweep in and out of fashion. In fact, that shifting of patterns and trends is what makes names so incredibly exciting to me. And Juliet, Isla, and Aurora will be “mom” names in a few decades just like Michelle or Courtney. It’s a fact of names: they fluctuate, and they’re in, and then they're out. It’s completely ok to want a name for your child that feels current and cool! Actually, it’s great by many people’s standards to go for Jaxon over Gerald. So then why are people with truly pure intentions and a passion for names going after parents who simply want to bestow upon their child what they think of as a cool and modern choice?
Although going with a name that’s a fad isn’t inherently bad at all, the “faddish” aspect of a name that’s trendy is often what’s ticking these name lovers off. Juliet, Isla, and Aurora might be current and cool, but they’ve got decades worth of history. Hartleigh, Nomi, and Reign, on the other hand, fail to meet that criteria. Which I suppose is a fair argument, yet the word “trendy” in no way is meant to be used to invalidate or point out a lack of history for a name. Plus, many parents aren’t looking for a name that’s belonged to a given number of medieval queens, or a couple saints, or have roots from Latin prefixes. In fact, I’d go out on a limb and say that that’s not what most parents want when they’re looking for a name. Because what parents hear when the kindergarten teacher calls on little Hartleigh isn’t the lack of origin, or the “trendiness,” or how much they regret not calling her a random suggestion on a baby name forum 6 years ago that in no way pertained to their style. They think “my goodness, that name sounds so cool and pretty, I’m so glad we chose it.”
Another big red flag that violates many namer’s codes of conduct include names that are spelled outside of the norms or put on a gender that doesn’t quite match up with the sounds of the name, which often occurs in names labelled as “trendy.” Hartleigh, for example. “Hartleigh looks way too trendy” someone may add “Hartley on a boy would be okay, I guess.” And if this hypothetical poster is asking for alternative spellings for their favorites, this is a wonderful comment. But if the parents-to-be are searching only for a choice between their favorites, hearing all of their finalists put down as “trendy” or “trashy” or “just a fad,” can be incredibly hurtful. I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again: names are such a reflection of the parents and what they want for their child, so to get a little carried away with criticism that isn’t asked for can make them feel uneasy about their choice, no matter how much you think it might be needed. At the end of the day, the parents are making the choice about their child’s name, and one unfortunate comment can make them feel uneasy about their choice, which is obviously a terrible feeling to have surrounding such a permanent and profound decision, no matter how far outside your comfort zone the name in question may be.
So although I understand the motivation to call out parents who are looking for names that sound cool, not names with the perfect meaning or origin, those aren’t necessarily bad reasons or qualifications to go into the naming process with. It might not be your idea of the right reasons, but making parents feel as if they are immoral for desiring a cute and fashionable name for their little baby is not, at least in my opinion, the way to go about such feelings. Maybe, the next time you run into a poll on randombabynameforum.com or your brother asks for help deciding between two names for his little boy that may not be your personal favorite, be thrilled that a person trusted your opinion on what to call their child, not the faddish qualities of the names chosen. Instead of reverting to "trendy," maybe explain that although their options may be stylish now, they aren't incredibly classic. Using "trendy" is counterproductive, and explaining what exactly you don't like about a particular name instead of going right back to trendy is likely a lot more helpful to the person receiving your advice.
In conclusion, the word “trendy” doesn’t have to represent something bad, like it has for so long. Often, like the previous example, the very names we glorify are the trendy ones, the cool ones, the not-super-unique ones. So there seems to be a big double-standard here: pick something that isn’t popular, but it can’t be something that people don’t like. And that’s impossible to achieve! If you like Olivia, it’s way too overused, yet choose Olivelyn and it’s far too trendy. A name lover’s instincts are to desire rare names, yet discard ones that don’t fit our favorites list, but that criteria can lead to not only the misuse of “trendy,” but also hurting people’s feelings. The bottom line is a little easier said than done: consider what you say, and like the names you like. Because the folks on randombabynameforums.com can name their own children.
Sincerely,
~Delphina Moon
What are your views on the word “trendy”? Are you guilty of any of the stated scenarios? Let me know down below!